Crazy Lift Lady strikes!!!
Stupendous Rash and I were having one of our usual InaneChatter (TM patent pending) conversations and I was all like hey, you realise if the only friend I have left in city actually well, you know what with you know what and then i will be all you know what (the first two you-know-whats are secret, the last one is not but if I told you, then you would guess at the first couple of you-know-whats and then it would not be secret and
my real age is 31years old because I do not reveal secrets and am mature, married woman - bar nite antics aside)
Then Stupendous Rash who takes her super-powers seriously thought that I needed to be resuced from impending life of being all alone on weekend watching reruns of Friends and Will&Grace so she came up with game plan of how I need to make new friends.
And I was like, how now brown cow?? There are being very limited ways to make friends at chronological age of 28. Let us not even be getting into my real age of 31years because I figure by then, all other people my age may have died and I will be all alone fighting alzeighmers or liver disease or whatever it is that affects people older than 30 and makes them the way they are...
So, I was like I know I know, I will start chatting up people in lift - living on 10th floor with very slow lift gives me mucho opportunity to catch unsuspecting fellow ashianites and try to make friendship with them And then Stupendous Rash also told me to use my secret weapon - husband's new cough syrup - it has 11%alcohol v/v and has been extremely effective in putting husband in good mood, hehehehhe.
I can ride the lift and when the fellow ahsianaite is starting to get all warmed up on making friendship with me, I can whip out cough syrup and spoons and cement the deal!!! YAY!!!
So, on thursday morning, feeling thinner and with producted hair I got into lift - guess who got into the lift on 8th Floor - the MTV VJ NIKHIL CHINAPPA in ganji and cut-offs... I sort of knew that he lived there but it was first time I has actually bumped into him in lift - time to put new plan in action.
Me to Chinappa: (surprised expression) Oh, so you live here??
Chinappa to me: ummm, yes!! You also live here?
Me to Chinappa: yes, I live on 10th floor
silence, we reach 6th floor (thinking thinking)
Me to Chinappa: So, nice tatoo
Chinappa to me: ummmm, thanks
silence, reaching 4th floor
Me to Chinappa: So, where are they from
Chinappa: Right arm - SF, left arm - Amsterdam
Me: Oh
silence
Me: So, do you like have insurance for them
Chinappa: (confused) ummm, insurance???
Me: You know in case it gets infected in foreign country and you get an abcess or something....
Chinappa: ummmm, well ...
life door opens and we reach ground floor
Chinappa: well, not really unless your skin is really sensitive it is not a problem
Me: (nodding wisely) yes, I see, well I have sensitive skin
Chinappa: (backing away slowly) Ok, bye
Me: (chirpily)ok, see you around
we meet in parking lot since it turns out his parking lot is right next to mine...
Chinappa: (forced smile) ok, bye
Me: (big chirpy anticipatory smile of being invited to wild mtv parties filled with nubile young metrosexuals hungry for older women) OK, bye, SEE YOU
ummm, its been four days - the car has not returned. ( I have been watching)
CRAZY LIFT LADY JUST HAD HER FIRST CASUALTY!!!!
An interview meme
I am discovering the excitement of doing memes - this is a interview one by
Secret Agent Josephine that I shamelessly begged to be part of and she has very nicely interviewed me - haha, but you can all pretend that i blurted out my need to be famous and that I begged and imagine that I am - famous, and so cool that people all over the world are dying to know what I really, really think (yes, platform shoes are sooooo out)
Here it is:
1. Is it margaritas and mallows? If not (or if so) decribe how and why you chose that name? Sounds like a nice treat to me... if I could drink a margarita, which I can't.
It is margaritas and miaows - margaritas is for the drink... because of my hispanic fixation (one of my closest friends is hispanic, i love nachos, the gypsy kings and all things tequila-related) but margaritas is really a blanket word for all drinking related activities and miaows is for my cats - seems like most of my life is spent running after them and their needs and they can be so funny and adorable sometimes. I just love alliterations, so I thought up this name.
2. Have you ever named a car? If so what was it and what did you name it? If not, what would you name a car that's in your life every day?
Yes, my car is named Naughty Boy. He's really a boy always getting into scrapes and is very nice boy, most times. A little bit of a drunk like me (because he consumes so much fuel) and sometimes he lets me down like when his clutch plate stops working when I have to leave from a party at 1am but overall we have loads of fun together.
3. Close your eyes and type the first word that comes to mind. Then explain yourself. No cheating and re-typing!
Paris - I just need to walk around the markets and go to Laduree and eat at all the places recommended by
Clotilde and avoid doing all the very touristy things I did my last time there. It's been a bit of an obsession for me and I take my five minute mental holidays there lately.
4.Fish gut marmelade or Toilet Paper Baklavah (sp?)?
Toilet paper baklavah? Because my cats would just not let me eat the fish gut marmalade in peace anyway.
5.What's your worst favorite chore and why?
Cleaning my cupboard - it's my dirty messy secret that i have a messy closet because otherwise I have the virgo fetish for having all that is visible really neat but what I cant see is a holy mess. So, I dread cleaning out my cupboard but its really fun when I get down to it because I discover old clothes, belts and little bits of fabric dumped away to make into new tops and spend ages trying everything on again and planning on a no-carb diet yet again.
And now if you want to tell me what I want to know about you,
The Official Interview Game Rules:
1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying "interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions - each person's will be different.
3. You will update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
ask me, ask me
Blast from the Past
If you know me at all, you know that my spirit is much stronger than my flesh when it comes to doing stuff - well, put a little spirit in me and the flesh is all jumping around, but i meant something else - I want to be a social butterfly (there i said it) I want to meet lots of people and make lots of plans so i have very many exciting things to write about (or maybe not cos i may then be too busy having fun) but my actual motivation to go out and meet people is kind of frozen by my deep fear of running out of stuff to say after one hour... which is why I actually never make plans on Republic Day, Independence Day or Gandhi Jayanti...not so I can feel patriotic but because they are dry days so spirits not available to support the flesh.
However, there has been one friend who I have been trying on and off to co-ordinate with for the last three years to hang out with!!! Only problem was we lived in the very big metropolis of Bombay where the schism of South-suburbs and North-suburbs runs very deep. And I am just talking about the west-side here. He is on the right side of the central railway tracks. However, We do not even live on the same side of the W.E. Highway, so you can imagine just how how tough it is to co-ordinate one nite at the pub...It took three years, about seven phone calls and divulgence of deep dirty secret of cell-phone ownership on PS's side to finally be able to meet up!!
But, would my worries of running out of conversation hold true??? SUSPENSE - as husband says when i get excited when I cook up some fancy dish and he is all appreciative - 'not everybody is me, you know'... or I come up with a brilliant joke 'Not everyone is Rash, you know (to get the joke and actually add on to it)'
Imagine my greatest joy & happiness when PS said he wasn't really hungry and would like to catch up over a beer at the HAWAIIN SHACK (so sure hawaiin is spelt hawwain, or is it just hawain, but then it would sound chinese like bean sprouts in hawain sauce, but hawaiin also sounds suspect can someone please tell me what the correct spelling would be? I know i could run a spell check i DONT WANT TO - ok enough bracketing) HAWAIIIN plays rocking LOUD music where smiling and lip-reading = scintillating conversation.
So I wented to Hawaiin in nice sexy but covered FCUK tee-shirt with suggestive message but colour black for slimming and was a teensy-weensy bit disappointed when PS did not say oh, you have lost ooodles of weight when I made comment about him gaining little married weight (having met PS for first time after his wedding which I missed by one week since I could not wait to escape from Calcutta, promise of free alcohol at Tolly club one week later notwithstanding)... Oh, well. Next Topic
So, we ordered beer - which for those of you on a budget will be pleased to know is only 100rupeess for a large bottle of king-fisher. And they were playing really good music all rock and roll - 60s and 70s CCR, Dire Straights varieties which was good because I do know most of the music from those times. So, we had one more topic - Rock musiz and how it just aint what it used to be - then they played Nirvana (and by they, I mean dumb DJ who is sucky at playing Charades - I tried miming 'Eye of The Tiger' to him atleast thrice and he didnt get it - at all) and Oasis and basically it fuelled one whole hour of conversation... Oh, oh and then husband came by also, since PS being frend of his also, since they have running hooby in common plus we got fed by PS's parents in Calcutta and all.
Topic three of discussion was the high prices of groceires in Japan where Mrs. PS is currently doing advanced studies in the Japanese language to which my soultion was - just eat sushi!!! simplistic but not the correct answer apparently!!
Then music got loud and husband wanted to leave - and we asked for cheque but it was only half of the coupons which were non-refundable.. and it goes against the strict disciplinarian upbringing I have had, to waste money... So we has another beer,
and another beer
and another beer
and another - by which time the dj switched off the music and I had to force PS to chug all music before horny cops stormed in and threw us out and some political-feeling newspaper wrote article about me for wearing suggestive message t-shirt (apparently in good old days, girls from Shivaji Park did not wear FCUK tee-shirts)
and then I went home and passed out - damn, I did not use my Topic of conversation #34 (i rehearse before i leave, so i dont seem limited)
I did too have a blast tho, and I do hope we not have to wait for another three years and another spousal trip to far-off lands before PS and I can meet up, we have to still cover discussion items from #4-#35. hehehehhe
Rest of week has swung by, with me giving advice to near & dear ones on love, marriage and not mixing the two. And eating most excellend kababs and kalii dal from Kareems. (The reason I suspect for diesel 26" low-waister still not climbing above mid-thigh region)
And tonite is bar-nite!!! HAHA no need for list of conversation topics becos it will be errr... shall we have anther drink(to samar/ sarika) , alternating with muah muah you coloured your hair red (to bar-nite bimbettes)and play woh lamhe (to dj atleast 20 times)
have awesome weekend my adoring public!!! muuuuaaaaah.
happy bday little pilitdh
When I was born i was just the cutest baby in the world (my mommy said, my mommy said) and when i was 6months old another cute baby popped out - Milind. He was all round and fat and I dont remeber much about him (since i was 6months old) but I do know he followed me everywhere i wented on my fat little fours.
When we were two, I inisisted on being picked up and carried everywhere by our granny and little Milind who haaad to do everything I did also wanted to be picked up - and me, already the thinking baby's sex symbol would tell him - if muktaai is carrying me, its not possible for her to carry you, is it? well, is it? Poor milind would go no, and i would ride in granny arms all over!! while poor milind would waddle around on his fat little legs in vain hope of me maybe descending. But princesses never gave up their exalted positions.
When we were 6 & 7, we discovered star wars...Being the only girl meant I got to be princess Leia and our grand-parents bed used to be our Millenium Falcon. Milind was Luke Skywalker and we actually had a light saber!!! Vikobaba was darthvader/ emperor/ storm=trooper hehehe (very wicked) and Luke Skywalker always rescued me. We were all brother sister so Han Solo never emerged, sigh!!!
When we got older, Milind suddenly lost all nice round baby fat and became swimming champion and gotted many awards and also gotted very brainy and big iit engineer but he never forgot hus dumb big sister and always gotted me nice gifties.
now he all married to pretty megha and they happily married in three's company situation in bay area and are also celebrating their first happy wedding anniversary today.
So, happy birthday milind, happy anniversary to both of you, congrats on the new house and hope you have many many wonderful years together. love u guys
Book meme
Hello, it is weekend and i have a meme (sucha funny word - meme, meme, meme hehehe)
forwarded by Lulu.
She is one of the people I know who can read so much more than me and she has 69 cookbooks (hehehe, 69 again) - i no can compete in Domestic Goddessing with this girl. Anyway, here goes -
1. Total number of books I've owned
I have about 80 books - but only my most prized ones are actually with me - most of them are lying with my mommy in her giant house.
2. Last book I bought
I normally go get half a dozen in a certain mode - like Indian writing in english or women writing or Magic Realism or Japanese writers. The two latest I got are:
Living to tell the Tale - Gabriel Garcia Marquez. I love Marquez and have got to the age where its exciting to know what makes people do the way they do (some may say biography but that sounds so boring no?) This book has been so interesting because I found out that Maconda (from One hundred years of solitutde) was an actual place. The other book I got was The Way to Paradise by Mario Vargos Llosa (The Feast of The Goat) about Paul Gauguin and his life in the Tahitian islands...
I basically love most South American Writers and wish I could seriously learn Spanish to read the originals. (craving to read Neruda in the original)
3. Last book I read
Tokyo Cancelled by Rana Dasgupta - This is about a flight to Tokya which well, gets cancelled and 13people cannot be put up in hotels and have to spend the night in an airport in some other city and decide to tell stories. The stories were wierd and some were just plain confusing - I am not sure Dasgupta was aiming at Magic Realism. I havent read any reviews of this book but always looking at reading Indian writers in English. I cannot take a call on whether I liked this book but it did give me strange dreams for a week.
4. Five books that mean a lot to me
1. Lord of the rings - J.R. Tolkein - husband got this entire set for me when we were all boyfrend-girlfrend like six years ago and is still one of the best gifts i have got out of him (yes, i have to resort to extorts) Because because of Frodo and Legolas and the trees that move and the giant spider Shebol and Aragorn (I had to reread the Return of the King with mental image of that hottie Viggo Mortensen - why cant my Danish buyers look like him, damn) and so many other magical mysterious things - I also think the movie rocked. i low brow what to do!!
2. The Jeeves series- P.G.Wodehouse - when i am all alone and every one i know has a different agenda i just have to sit down with one of them and forget everything else. Always makes me smile.
3. The Unbearable Lightness of Being: Milan Kundera. I love this book. I love all Kundera books - how he can get so objective and able to break down the emotion of love - man/ woman, mother/ son into each and every involved person's perspective is just WO!!
4. The complete Calvin & Hobbes series: Bill Waterson - because I think that is what a baby chinmulgund-koppikar may be like - precocious and bratty and a little non-competitve and annoying as hell. And I can completely see Hobbes in all my miaow-miaows.
5. Winnie The Pooh & The hundred-Acre Forst: Milne - because I suspect I may also be a bear with very little brain who needs her elevenses. Another gift from husband which I found at Strand Bookstore in NYC.
5. Which 5 people would you most like to see fill this out in their blog?
Rash
FCUK DIETS
going to get meself a t-shirt saying just that...i gotted tight pink tee from Sam (thank you darling muuuuuaaaahhhh) which says Label Whore - now we all know that you can only wear sexy tight t-shirt if we dont have back fat rolls hanging out from low-waisted pants and i try and i try and i try - and i get satisfaction but not the variety of stepping on scales and then truimphantly pumping hand in air and screaming yes yes and then smirking at fat-ass aunties with three chins heheheh...
my satisfaction is unfortunately more of oral variety - last weekend haded most excellent biryani, maida-polas, most excellent parathas and most excellent cappucino brownies!!! not able to do hand-pumping and smirking at gym... only thing that is disappearing is what we politely refer to as upper body ahem ahem....
NEED TWO THINGS MOST MOST IMPORTANTLY - NOT INTER-TRADEABLE.
1. Salma Hayek Rack
2. Jenifer Aniston hair
Oh, and new nokia phone while waiting for GOD to clear backlog of solving tenshun in iraq africa and russia and get started on me.
OH OH, T-SHIRT IS GOING TO SAY " WILL WORK FOR EFFICIENT TAPE-WORM" ON BACK
Officially Adult
Have you ever wondered when we stop being kids to our parents and start being adults? At 16, I thought it was a chornological event - you know like when I would be 18 - can vote, can drive, can get married if I want to... but it didnt happen. I did vote, I did drive (mostly them up the wall) and well, almost got married to a complete rotter... I do plead temperory insanity for that one.
At 23 boyfriend was convinced into beliveing that no other woman would be as wonderful and better suited for him and we should spend our lives together (again, pleading tempeorary insanity here, kidding kidding) and parents were all yea yea and I got casually engaged (translated as casual=no rock and engaged=no other boys) and I needed to not do the typical indian thing of moving from my parents place to husband place and moved to Bangalore for an extremely badly paid job with my own apartment where I bought my own tea and veggies and did gasp!!! budgeting. This was a rite but still was not officially an adult as needed the family bank acount to get me my tickets to BBay and back everytime.
At 24 married and Domestic Goddessing in Calcutta (i swear i was - used to make exotic indian dishes like ragda-patice and dahi-bhindi) I was well on way to being an adult... but not yet.
Now I am 28 - I figure I am always always going to go to my mommy to get my cuts kissed better, I am always always going to use my papa's smile as ultimate seal of approval. I do make my own decisions, sometimes they are not decisions anybody agrees with or approves but thats what being an adult is all about no?
This weekend was one of those where I felt a lot growed up though - Stupendous Rash and I took out our absolutely fabulous (and I am not kidding when I say fabulous and strong and cool) mother out for a drink...(we have been sitting around with the parents for a drink (alcoholic of course, soda is just calories)) to the DOME, the new lounge bar at the Intercontinental... and the growed up part was I picked up the tab!!! YEA!!!!! its quite exciting when we can finally do that for our parents...which is not to say that the mommy buying me diamonds is going to stop anytime soon...i say always keep the diamond-buying. Its my inheritance to make up for the fat thigh gene.
On saturday we went off to Lonavla to a total on-first-sight loser bungalow but improved at 8pm when the wino came out, to have happy family weekend together where we did the following:
a. medical talk (4 doctors)about stolen kidneys
b. reading of trashy chick-lit by Stupendous Rash and hunting for the steamy sections in old Harold Robbins by me
c. playing badminton with junior cousins (I could not play upto par as I have still not recovered from my disappointment of not making the professional level due to team politics)
d. eating authentic lonavla dhaba food - lachha parathas and all varieties of butter masalas (a pox on anyone who serves me anything makhni for the next month)
e. giggling, lots of giggling - I cant help it Stupendous Rash kept saying Pipudi...
f. did i mention giggling - damn it she said pipudi!!!!!!!!!
What we did not do - a. Get vada-pav at khopoli and b. Samosa at Chembur grrrrrrr
Oh, did I mention I have a new parking spot in my building - Parking Space #69 - heheheheheh, I said 69.
Just found out that the ohsohappeneing and therefore supercrowded and overpriced
Polly esthers is a night club chain in the US frequented by drunken teenagers and out of towners (sez so in link, not me) .... hehehe which means my insticnts were spot on when I had exactly one drink, had smelly tammy step on my pretty toes exposed in open sandals (also pretty) and decide this place too non-happeneing for me!
Did you know that out super-cool and again waaaaaaaay overpriced olive also has ripped off the logo from a bar in SF?
i know i never talk about my work but today was screamworthy - would really want to post for a job where i can be island unto myself and not needing anyone!!! Have to co-ordinate with some random ass 100crore company having own lift in office which means all the people there drunk on power of being part of 100crore company and own indpendent office lift. Trying to get fabric out of them is like extracting wisdom teeth from me - oho, its there its there they just wont part with it. DAMMIT - the chappie there actually had the guts to tell me not to be rude and hung up..... me?? how dare he!!!!!!! - i'm the only one allowed to hangup on people.
This is after I was on hold for 10minutes while I was transferred from person to person trying to figure out when I could get some canvas to send to be printed at HIS NOMINATED PRINTER (if you can read between the lines it says bc bc bc between each word but I polite girl - no abuse except when driving when it is gloves off)
So, I had to call him back and say ji, ji, ji after each work - having got the nisha brand of supersarcastic politeness in hindi, he also got all polite and said ya ya fabric sending by 2pm...still awaiting....
need
new
job
with
no
idiots
involved
on chirpier note, stupendous rash swings into town tomorrow to spread mirth, bonhomie and all-around cheer for her mommy and me.. It being the bday of the fabulous Pebapachi (shit shit now have to do post on fabulous my mommy) next week we all going to Lonavla on supposed to be girly weekend but been hijacked into Shenoy-Koppikar...need to have more emphasis on Koppikar, as in Koppikar-Shenoy weekend to be bearable.
Will need to pack super-saver pack of maragaritamix!!!!!!
City reeling under horny stressed cops who cant control themselves
STUPID GROUNDNUTS!!!
husband gotted me some groundnuts last nite (he has evil plans of killing the heathy diet by getting yummy stuff and ergo keeping me fat and not sexy in eyes of other men)... and bloody groundnuts must have been dirty or something - now my throat is sore and i ish sniffling and overall in need of looong nap - and evil sofa in cabin is tempting me with cosy busy dirt brown upholstery....sigh!!! but work we must.
I really have to say whats up with the Bombay police - dude!!!!!!1 they used to be the sweetest things - break a signal all I had to do was say saheb saheb flutter eyelashes and i would get off with a parat karu naka and 20bucks (i have frends who have even gottn off with giving imported smokes - hehehehe).
but now they are catching young girls who are coming all the way from ghatkopar to marine drive to hang out with boyfriend and raping them???? at 3pm - DUDE!!!!Now i really dont know if it is the short skirts we girls (not me cos my legs not skinny enough) are wearing or the fact that we go to marine drive because you know in the good old days girls not from marine drive did not go to marine drive or that the dance bars are shutting down but man are they frustrated!!!!
they actually grabbed some woman's boobs at Thane - i'm like DUDE!!!! she was with her husband, she was like 40years old so dont think they were like Pamela Andersenish at all -
hello, can we please have a small castration ceremony seminar for the Police Force - either that or a lobotomy - I am sure they can get a group discount.....
A destressing seminar - NOT!!! what are they stressed about? they just reach out and grab women like they are those squeezy tenshun balls. Not done you creeps just not done.
To cheer myself up, I did try and read the back page gossipy news but gave up when I heard
Paris Hilton is visiting BBay to launch her fragrance - why would anyone want to buy anything from someone who looks like this? at best it would be eau de hoe???
My hero
How may of us would really stop in our busy lives to see why the person next to us is unhappy or worried? I would not - I'm a very not my problem person - a injured dog or cat maybe, people no!!!
On Wednesday evening, husband dearestetsest (yes, reason for extra love following) caled to say could not join for run as he found two poor, but well scrubbed kids bawling on the station platform and was going to check on what the problem is - so while i left for my run (reveral of shaadi weekend effects) he checked with the two kids Karan(11) and Minu (6) and found out they had been seperated from their father while boarding the train from Andheri to Bhayander. He then took then to the Railway Police Station, since they were scared and not willing to give their address, got the Station Master after a lot of persuasion to PA page the missing father, called Indian Express for a Childline number and basically sat with the kids till their father finally showed up - three hours later. Apparenlty, if the children are not claimed then they are sent to a remand home, from where I am sure there is no escape. The father turned out to be a alcoholic unemployed widower who loved his two children but was not capable of providing a roof or footwear to his two children.
Then at 9.30 after the three hour drama, husband made sure father and children boarded a bus and reached home safe and sound. (since you really cannot trust the Mumbai POlice) The next day husband went back to the little slum where they live and got the children slippers and that is when the photo-op with Indian Express happened. We have been inudated with good work calls ever since.
I am going to scan the article and put it up since I cant find a link on their website.
In the meanwhile, if anyone can help us out interms of providing education or maybe employment to their father, please e-mail me at n_koppikar@yahoo.com
movie review
hello, i being such an authority on everything (yes, virgo, kya kare) would like to commenter on the Kool new movie of S05 (yes, export industry).
So, last nite the familia wented to see Ish's latest movie Kya Kool Hain Hum...review following just below, below only - look na, blog-reading uncle!!
Nish says: sleepy
Nish says: bloody movie went on till 2,30
Nish says: got home at 3, made tea
Nish says: and fell asleep at 4
Nish says: and no alcohol involved!!!!!!!!!!its a crime to keep me up so late without alcohol
rushes says: shit when did it start?
Nish says: 11.30 i think
Nish says: loooong movie
Nish says: very funny tho
Nish says: ish rocks in it
rushes says: really?
rushes says: tellings story, quickly
Nish says: ok so basically ritesh and tush 2 losers
rushes says: ok...then?
Nish says: tush goes to jyotish who says girl with til on dil be changing ur life
Nish says: ish aggressive pan parag chewing lady cop
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: who beats shit out of lady molestors
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: then there is some rapist going around and funny chain of events lead to tush being suspect
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
rushes says: so ish with tush?
Nish says: so ish is transformed into sexy girl to entice him a la miss. congeniality
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: then ish does sexy dance 1
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: then ish does sexy dance 2
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: then ish falls in love with tush while doing sexy dance 2
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: then there is this transvestite character that is loaded
Nish says: so rit pretend to be in love with tranny to get rich w/o seeing tranny
rushes says: ok...who that bes?
Nish says: and tranny gets neha dupia of college going prossy fame to find out if rits love being true for tranny
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: then tush kidnaps tranny with blanket around trannys face for mandir marriage
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: then blanket falls off and rit discovers his so called love being tranny
rushes says: and then wot happens....????
Nish says: then rit decides he in love with neha dupia of college prossy fame
rushes says: my gawd scary ass movie
Nish says: then two two copules is happeneing
Nish says: then movie is ending
rushes says: with prossies and rapists and lady cops
Nish says: but wait - they have to figure out who did rape plkus murder of girls
rushes says: and trannies
rushes says: so then wot happes???
Nish says: so rajpal yadav in guest apperance and cut off hands of rapees also pops up
Nish says: so all loose ends tie up
rushes says: hmmmmm
rushes says:interesting....
Nish says:and then we all sing kya kool hai hum
rushes says: i'll wait for cable guy to show
Nish says: but phunny
Nish says: yea ya
Nish says: i gotted free ticket
BUT YOU GUYS DONT - GO PAY MONEY IN BLACK
(I PROMISE THE COPS IN BANDRA ARE NOT COVERING THE SUBURBIA BEAT ANYMORE)Please go see it - its really funny - Riteish Desmukh is hilarious - Ishaa Koppikar rocks!!! Tushhar Kapoor is also really funny and Neha Dupia has not changed her name yet (oh, i did spell the other three names correct by the way - sab sunita menonji ki daya hai)
(thash me sistah - isnt she pwetty?)
And now I also want to commenter on how when we go into stores and land up buying stuff because u get free stuff with it (no? its just me then?) well, i land up doing that a lot on the internet only the other way around - I go to these free mind and body enhancing websites like ediets and style.com and nytimes and then i feel so guilty for taking free advice that I say yes, please send me receipies on low cal desserts and also on how to be more spiritual and thinner and a better pet owner and the latest trends in new york (aaaah, vicarious living!!). So i get very very excited and feel ohso popular for the first ten seconds when it says i have 20new messages in yahoo mail YAY I SO POPULAR and then spend ten minutes deleting the lastest news from south beach diet... oh, no i would never unsubscribe - that is just rude.
DRINK!!!
I just have to have to write this down before i forget - this conversation took place about two weeks ago at a longe bar
Me: Oh, I think I will have a beer (trying to save da money)
Girl who never eats: Oh, you know i read somewhere that alcohol does not have any calories, its all in the mixers
Me: (stunned that someone has validated my biggest dreams) What about beer
Girl who never eats: Oh, beer has calories
Me: Yes, thats right - beer is not really really alcohol is it - i mean there are no mixers in beer (thats quick thinking, nish)
Girl who never eats: Yes, we are just talking about alcohol that could have mixers or you know ice or water though water has no calories also
Me: Yea, I can start drinking neat - works out cheaper also, since you know they make their money on the mixers (they being evil restaurants that want to gyp me of my husband's hard-earned money)
two days later
Me: Oh, you know the girl who never eats read somewhere that alcohol does not have any calories, its all in the mixers
Girl who eats and drinks: oh, dahling - then i'm going to lose ooodles of weight - on my new alcohol only diet
one week later at sangeet
Me: tra la la la la
one week and one day later at cocktail party
Me: tra la la la la
one week and two days later at shaadi
Me: tra la lala alala
one week and three days later on scales
Me: Holy cow - alcohol does have calories!!! damn girl who does not eat!!!
WE ARE NOT MOVING - YOU ARE DRUNK OUT OF YOUR WITS...DIAL 1-800-STOP-ME-DRINKING AND PLEDGE ALL FUTURE ALCOHOL TO THE RASH& NISH ALCOHOL RESEARCH FUND
riti da shaadi da fotus
Ok, i've surfaced - the wedding rocked!!! Finally got an insight into the famous Dilli shaadis... love da riti, love da delhi babes and boys, love da partying!!!
